and I guess this is the second part
in which we smoke cigarettes at midnight
an it is cold
not like in alaska
but cold
& the smoke looks like our breath is freezing.

I miss your jesus hands.

these hands

miss yours.

july slipped away from me.
august had me holding on tight.
september pushed and shoved me.

october was a mess.

still got some stardust
in my pocket.

l’esprit del’ escalier {french}

-idiom

1. the feeling you get after leaving a conversation when you think of all the things you should have said.

In the desert
I saw a creature, naked, bestial,
Who, squatting upon the ground,
Held his heart in his hands,
And ate of it.
I said: „Is it good, friend?“
„It is bitter-bitter,“ he answered;
„But I like it
Because it is bitter,
And because it is my heart.“
- Stephen Crane.

you gave me a bambi shirt for sleeping
which would probably fit a 5-year-old
but that’s ok
I grow small when I dream.

I wanna hear your phone ring
and see you in your dad’s white shirt
because I like nerds who listen to NWA.

&

&

there is an angel
with red hair
who gives me the creeps
& I turn off the lights.

be careful with your shaking hands,
you could break something.
I dressed like you today
to make you feel closer
but it didn’t work
and I couldn’t steal your toothbrush
though I was hanging out with that gang member
who made me cry
when he asked me if he can lick on my cheek
when I said
„I am an artist“.

Sommerpäuschen.

I’ll leave
and I won’t take you with me
I don’t think
I’ll ever come back.
and even if your eyes
are broken bottles
I know your poison
in a pretty glass.

and when it comes
to the rain
just be glad you’ll smile again.